Tãrâmul meu

  I used to question my husband’s love for me because his love isn’t loud. It’s not like those cute couples on social media, those men in the movies, or even in the books I read. He is not the type to walk in with flowers everyday. He will never hold a boombox over his head confessing his love through an open window. He has never scattered rose petals all over the floor, with expensive jewelry in a little surprise box. I used to see those posts, watch those movies, read those books and think.. “why doesn’t my husband love me like that? “Why isn’t he that romantic?” “Why do all these other men do these huge gestures constantly?” “Does my husband not love me enough?” One night, we were standing in the kitchen as I was scrolling through social media. I started seeing the rose petals on the bed, the ring boxes, and these huge grand gestures. “Why don’t you love me like this?” “Why don’t you care enough like this?” “Why don’t we show our love like this to each other? He looked

“Just Let them. If they want to choose something or someone over you, LET THEM. If they want to go weeks without talking to you, LET THEM. If they are okay with never seeing you, LET THEM. If they are okay with always putting themselves first, LET THEM. If they are showing you who they are and not what you perceived them to be, LET THEM. If they want to follow the crowd, LET THEM. If they want to judge or misunderstand you, LET THEM. If they act like they can live without you, LET THEM. If they want to walk out of your life and leave, hold the door open, AND LET THEM. Let them lose you. You were never theirs, because you were always your own. So let them. Let them show you who they truly are, not tell you. Let them prove how worthy they are of your time. Let them make the necessary steps to be a part of your life. Let them earn your forgiveness. Let them call you to talk about ordinary things. Let them take you out on a Thursday. Let them talk about anything and ev

  The worst marriage advice my husband and I were given years ago: “Never ever go to bed mad! Find a resolution, then sleep” It’s better to go to bed with an unresolved argument, then to stay up and fight when you are both tired. Get some sleep, cool down, then talk. “Happy wife happy life!” This is not true. You BOTH need to feel happy, loved, and respected. “You shouldn’t argue! Conflict is a sign of an unhealthy marriage.” Arguing and disagreeing is good, and healthy. As long as it’s done in a productive/healthy way, arguments can actually be a sign of a healthy marriage. “It should come easy, you shouldn’t have to constantly work on a relationship if it’s meant to be” Marriage is WORK. It takes daily check ins with each other, apologies, realizing your own toxic behaviours, and working through the messy parts that life throws at you. “You shouldn’t go through dry spells if you’re with the right person. You’ll always want it!” Every long term couple can go through dry spel